Saturday, February 28, 2009

Just life

Well, I feel like I haven't written in a while or posted. sorry. I feel so busy lately. I also always feel compelled to write when something good is happening in my life. Well to tell you the truth, we've had a ruff couple weeks. Camden has been sick with an ear infection so his sleep habits were rudely interrupted. Heath and I are trying to deal with no sleep and a fussy baby but it's getting better.,,.not to mention a crazy toddler. Things are getting better I guess i just feel like venting. Why oh why can i not have a baby that sleeps? Honestly, Jace never slept and I worked full time and I really don't know how I did it. Camden is def. demanding and never wants me to put him down. I still do though bc that's how they learn to be on their own. Heath is of course gone at school all the time and I'm getting anxious to figure out what's going to happen this summer with a job. I just hope he can find anything with the economy so bad. We have some promising positions but nothing solid yet. Jace seems to be getting more aggressive with the baby now. Maybe he just figured out that he'll be staying around now. He's still sweet with him but he gets frustrated when so much of my time is taken up with him. It's hard for me to bc I feel bad when I can't play with Jace. He is gone at preschool 4 days a week for 2.5 hours and he LOVES it!!!!! I guess I'm figuring out what it's like to be a mom/taxi driver. I'm now understanding why its so nice to have a nice car for the mommy--because you live in it! Someday we'll get one and hopefully a mini van bc they are just so nice with kids! When we rented one, I loved it. I still have to convince Heath. I have some time. I think what's hardest most of all, is adjusting to the fact that I really have no time for myself anymore. That's hard. I see other women that have all this time to still enjoy their hobbies and passtimes with x number of kids and I just don't know how they do it. Any ounce of free time I have during the day is spent keeping the house in order. Camden still won't take formula so I'm always on the clock with feeding. Last week, I was able to put Camden down and go the movies with the gals in our ward and that was so nice. The first time I've been out in a long time. The movie wasn't too great but it was still fun. But, I was so grateful that he was still asleep in bed when I got home. But yet, awake an hour later. I guess he's just a growing hungry boy. Last time he was weighed he was 11.1 so I know he's growing. Somedays are just harder than others. I miss sewing and doing fun projects, I miss blogging...which is never these days, I miss using photoshop and scrapbooking, I miss having time to read and enjoy a good book, I miss a lot of things but I don't want to be complaining. I'm just using this as a sounding board. it is off into cyberspace. I smile everytime Camden coos and laughs, everytime Jace says, "wait, I gotta think." everytime Heath comes home, everytime I talk with a good friend, everytime I go to church, everytime I think of the many blessings I've been given in my life.